"to all those lost souls who have forgotten to believe in the immensity of love"

 

-The rundown-

date: circa. December 1982.

location: Ontario, Canada

 

A family new to Canada less than a year.  Christmas is approaching and their eldest boy is enrolled in school.  Not totally understanding or influenced by the north american culture yet, he is introduced to some concepts of Christmas by a friend from kindergarten.  The child, being a child, returns home and speaks with his father, curiosity of the world overflowing.  "dad, my friend told me at school that his father just spent $200 on a big tree for Christmas.  daddy i know we don't think you have enough money for something like that, but if you lend me that (points to a small saw), i can go over there (points outside to the park) and i can get us a tree"... the father shocked responds "no son, you can't just cut a tree down anywhere it's not right"... the son.."but daddy it's just a tree.." Trusting his father, the boy relents.  The father watches as his 5 year old son walks away, dissappointed and heart broken.  His heart breaks.  His son was right, new to the country, he barely makes enough to make ends meet to survive, he does not have the money to buy a tree, it is his families first Christmas in Canada and he has no money even for gifts, they are only surviving. How much does his heart break.  As a father he wishes to more than just provide for his family, he wants to give them what they want... more than just survival.  How much can his heart break?  He cries.  Inside and out.  He prays.  He has no resolve in this matter and knows not what to do.  Darkness and tears are what he's left with as the night consumes his slumber, he looks at his three children, the wife who has chosen to follow him.  He wonders if it was a mistake to leave to this cold, lonely place.  He wonders if his steps where miscalculated and if it is his family that will bear the burden of a misjudged step.  His heart breaks, sleep overcomes him. These are the thoughts he closes his eyes to.  These are the thoughts that consume his heart.

 

A new day. Hope? How can there be hope? Inadequacy.  Why should they suffer?  Am i too proud? Please God don't let them suffer.  These are the cries of his heart as he awakes.  I came for you Christ.  I named the youngest one "God with us".  I'm torn.  His brother in law walks in, and brings him the mail.  A letter, no return address?  A bill? An advertisement? He opens it hopeless and half hearted.  He cannot believe his eyes.  He sees a cashiers cheque for $400.  It says, for your Christmas celebration.  Anonymous. The shock.  The doubt.  Is it real? Is this a joke? Is someone so cruel as to play on his heartache? No one else knows but my wife though.

 

Christmas. A tree.  New clothes for his wife and children. Chicken legs..it's not a turkey, but it's something special and his wife has prepared it with all her love.  He understands where the cheque came from.  He's humbled.  The tears he falls asleep too are not tears of sadness or heartache, rather tears of thanksgiving for the grace and favour God has shown him.

 

-----my turn-----

yo. what a story.  i just heard it for the first time tonight. i can't even imagine.  i wasn't the kid if you were wondering.  that was my older brother.  yah it's real. i'm shocked.  i was too young to remember, but i don't doubt it.  my dad said he has told me this story before... maybe he has, but i don't think so.  that was my first Christmas in Canada. i'm in tears as i write this. 

 

God. people wonder why i believe in God. some people wonder why i'm a Christian.  i've even wondered why sometimes i just act in faith and just feel things are going to work out, cuz God's in control.  maybe i do remember it, just not all of it.  It's things like that, that have happened in my life that humbles me now before him.  He provided for us.  Who else would know? From where i'm from to where i am.  I really can't fathom asking him for much more, he already knows and he wants to give us the best.  How great is my God?  Some of you may think $400 is not a big deal (btw it was somewhere around there..i was kinda choked up and didn't hear the real amount)... but to me, it means so much more right now. Love. yah. Provision. yah. God. no doubt.

 

"and how can i stand here with you... and not be moved by You?" - Lifehouse 

 

Peace.